We all have been in some situations where we been truly wronged and hurt by someone. We have been through some rough times where we felt like life is intentionally being hard on us.
In such cases, it’s much much harder to forgive and let go. On the other hand, it’s easy to hold on to those bitter experiences and reliving them.
You are absolutely right that what you had experienced is terrible and you are reacting to it & feeling sorry for yourself by holding onto those things as you are badly hurt.
But let me ask you something – Do they (people who have done you wrong) deserve a single more second from your precious life?? Do you allow a thief to enter your home and live there forever??
“No”, Right, then why you are holding onto the past and allowing it to steal your joy by letting it live in your mind.
Forgiveness is not for the other person, it’s for yourself. Forgiveness is a gift to yourself – a gift of your mental and emotional freedom.
How to forgive someone who has caused great pain to you as this is not at all easy?
All it requires is your willingness to forgive. Keep in mind that you are doing this for yourself and for your peace & happiness. If the damage is too deep then give yourself some time to get through it and don’t rush.
But, if you really want to move ahead with your life happily and peacefully, you have to forgive and there is no other way.
Here are a few steps you can practice to learn the art of forgiveness:
- Before forgiving the person who wronged you, forgive yourself for allowing that person to hurt you
- Acknowledge it by recognizing how much pain it caused you and decide to limit its power on you
- Show empathy – try to understand why the other person has done you wrong. Yes, what they did to you is completely unfair but try to understand what caused them to do that (maybe their past experiences, conditioning from their surroundings)
- Hold onto forgiveness – whenever you will get caught by thoughts on those past experiences, practice forgiveness and detach yourself from that situation
- Make a commitment that you will make yourself feel better
Pull yourself out from the hatred and resentment by completely forgiving yourself, the other person who wronged you, and the situation.
We all deserved to be happy no matter what has happened to us in the past. Do not allow bad experiences to destroy your life. Completely forgive everything that making you feel sad about yourself and move on.